Laz's Last Day

 TBT:  I'm posting it here because it is disturbing and some people might not want to see this.  But if you do, here it is.  I went through the day of course, but you don't have to.  But it might be helpful to some who might be about to be experiencing a similar sad event...

I brought Laz into the Vet in a carrier.  A top-opening carrier seems to be easier for cats to deal with.

But see those wet spots on the carrier?  Those were tears.

The Vet took him away and returned him with a catharter adhered to his front leg.

He was so calm about it all that I thought he had already been sedated.  The box of tissues was for me.  I used up about half of it.

Laz never "just sat around" in a Vet office.

And especially not when there were dogs barking just outside the exam room.

We sat in the exam room for 30 minutes.  I was getting worried that the sedative was wearing off and he might experience some pain at the final shot.  I even opened the back door of the room and expressed my concern to the vet techs.  The Vet said she would be there "in a minute".  Which was 10.  And which felt like "forever".

But he hadn't been sedated yet.  He was just sitting calmly...

I didn't take a picture of his last minute.  That was just too hard.  I was crying too much.  So was the Vet; she knew his sad life-story.

This may be the harder part to view.  I always let the other cats sniff a deceased former Mews.  I laid him out...

Marley found him immediately and sniffed.

Lori joined him.

I don't know what they think when sniffing a dead cat.  I assume they recognized him.

It is important that they understand he is dead and not just "missing".

They spent a while at it.  I was actually glad they did.

It might mean they understood he was dead.

Lori stayed long.  They were BFFs for many months.  I don't know why that changed.

Now it is pick and shovel time.  Laz is double-bagged in the basement freezer, waiting for his final resting place in The Memorial Garden.  I had just removed all the Memorial Boxes and covered the area with heavy cardboard box material to smother the weeds over the Winter.  Now I have to remove some of it and create a good safe deep hole for him.

Digging 2 such holes in less than 3 months is beyond just "sad".  But we don't get to time things like this.  What happens, happens.  And now I have 2 boxes to build to go above their burial spots.  Not like that's the important thing, but it means more tears. doing 2.  😭

This has not been a good few months...

9-11

A post I wrote but didn't post on my main blogs... 

I am writing this September 5th.  Because I can't 6 days from now.   It is too specific to the day if I did and the memories would be too hard.  And I wasn't even there.  I can't even imagine the experience of those at the sites.  I probably don't deserve the right to say anything.  

But I have memories about it, so I will speak.  And I remain SO SO VERY Angry.  Forgetting would be a gift...

My recollections:

About 8:50 AM, I hear on the radio that a WTC Tower has been hit by "a plane".  My 2nd level supervisor was previously in charge of "Emergency Management", so I tell him about it.  He turns on his radio and calls a few people he knows to find out more.  I go back to work.

At about 9:05, we hear that the other Tower has been hit.  Oh crap, it's not an accident...  2nd Level boss makes more calls, I go to the media room.  We have TVs there.  Everyone in the office knows something horrible is happening.

WTC Tower 1 is falling...

We are watching the replays.  Then I suddenly shouted "that's the other one".  Heads turn.  Is is indeed not a replay.  We are all horrified worse.   I had been up there once and couldn't look over the edge through the glass walls.  My friends laughed at me.  But it was a long way down.

What is worse than a horrible event once?  Twice does it.  We gasped for breath at the first Tower falling; the 2nd left nothing in us.  There wasn' anything we could DO about it.  Helpessness times anger = Zero.

We became ANGRY though.  We didn't know what was happening, but we understood SOMEONE was doing it.

Shortly after 9:30, we all felt a deep "THUMP" come up from the ground.  We were in an old solid stone building just a couple blocks from The White House.  No shock-absorption.   Then we heard another plane hit the Pentagon.  Tghat was the "THUMP".  We felt it a mile away.

And then we heard a 4th plane was on it's way to  Washington DC.  Most people just left for home.  I watched the street just fill up and unmoving.  My carpool decided to wait.

So there was this plane headed our way and no way to actually leave.  I went up on the roof to look around.  Nothing much else I could do.  It seemed safer on a big stone building than on the streets below filled with cars full of gasoline...

The last plane didn't get here.  We didn't know about "why" until hours later.  Communications were iffy.

Today, I know about the final struggle to stop that last plane (and honor those who stopped it) but we didn't know then (in the moment it was occurring).

I was the carpool driver that day.  When the streets began to clear, I called everyone to say we could leave.  It seems so minor now, but we had to take a weird route out of DC and frustrating details mattered at the time.  We were all so angry and confused.

I got us onto a familar road way out of our usual path and got us to the meeting spot.  No one said a word; just got in their cars to go home.

I can't quite remember the next few days.  I think we all just obsessively watched the Towers falling and people running from the dust and debris and the anger at the deaths (some agonizing ones of people swan-leaping to escape the flames and one person falling while pushing away from the abrasive walls.

I will never forgive or forget.  

I will never forgive or forget. 

I will never forgive or forget. 

Justice has not yet been provided.  

The 2nd Tower to fall, I think...

  My anger remains unabated...  

WOW!

Cat Food Bowls

These are our food bowls.  Actually, we have a dozen of them. 

They are 3.5' square and 1" deep.  The sides are steep so our food doesn't get out. 

They are melamine, so they should be hand-washed (they get brittle in the dishwasher).  They are sometimes hard to find.  And sometimes cheap and sometimes expensive.  You have to look at the direct cost and the shipping (they try to trick you about that).  Sometimes they are at Target.

We LOVE them!

Cat Love

Mooch

'Mooch' is a comic strip mostly featuring Mooch (the cat) and his friend Earl (a small dog) and sometimes their owners.  They live in different houses, but spend much of their time together.

Here is one example of Mooch's love for his Little Pink Sock...


And there are lots MORE HERE!